2002-07-22
messing around is appropriate at the mo'
In the midst of conflict and war in mind. Seriously. Ever since I stepped my feet in the office this morning, suddenly one weird feeling splashing on mind. I have been questioning myself, have I been doing anything valuable or something remarkable for this office?? Does what I contributed for the past 2 months cater the needs of them employing me aboard? To make thing worst, As I was placed next to the office network printer, I came accross a few uncollected printout material came from i-dunno-know. I saw a few P&C papres which knocked me off. There was nothing directly saying or pointing anything but some of the info written on the paper makes me realise that I must do something. But how?? I am so messed up.
Seriously, people would see how everything looks fine and run smoothly on my side , yet it's not as smooth or as fine as it is. I am strugglinh nowadays. This office is dominated by male worker and it give me an opportunity to be exposed to sucha a new thing compared to my former employer. It would never gonna be easy to go around and seek for help and so, or asking for some co-operation, but till today I am still surviving. Adoptation to new environment never been easy actually. Yet, i do think i pass this stage earlier on. Thank God for that. And the biggest pitfall that need to be improved is getting a new challenge for the staff overall. But how?? And again I am so messed up.
Left the work behind, I will get my arse to sit down and seek for solution and remedies to overcome the pitfall. Let me focus on a few highlights over the weekend. Nothing much in fact. I had been devotioning myself to my OB studies for the rest of 11 chapters and 12 case studies to be fully understood and blends everything. It is now lock safe n sound ready for tomorrow's battle. The weekend also has witnessed some changes in a few things as a new resolution arise and some untouchable planning has been revolutionize. What is needed now is stick to the vow and we'll see the result in a 2 months time?? Is it okay?? I am keeping my finger for this or else again I will be messed up.
Damn it. I think I have crap here. care for lunch???
Adieu!
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kaezrin at 12:53 p.m.