2004-10-04
letter of love
Dear Khilfi Ezzan,
For once, assalamulaikum.
How are you doing my darling son? Mama seriously hope it is a very good jovial day for you darling. Mama is writing to you this open piece of note due to some reasons that I hope one day you will understand why did I do so.
It has been my very great intention to feed and brings you the best for all your life long. One of my goals is to continuosly breastfeed you, i mean exclusively, breastfeed you at least till you are 1. Then by you reach 1, perhaps, I have to introduce formula to you at least during day time, and hope I can still feed you my breast milk at night time.
Anyhow, I am so afraid that my dream and hope will not be realise. I come to understand that my milk supply is not very sufficient at the time with the amount of demand you are making son. I am not blaming you on this baby, coz, for once I know you are one healthy baby who needs all the nutritious in the world. It is my body or maybe my hormone which cant seems to work well at the time.
Thus, baby, this memo is just an early predicament to tell u on some changes that might incur soon, but i wish for latter. I am very sad in fact. I also come to know that my 3 bottles of milk supply that I froze at the office might turn sour too. Damn thing. (ops, mind my language darling). Mama is so upset. Some happened to incidently defroze the freezer without telling me over, barely ignoring the notice I paste on the fridge door.
So darling, I will monitor how things going to be in the next couple of days perhaps a week. If things does not improve, I have no other option, except t go your favourite Giant hypermart and buy maybe Enfalac A+ for you(for a start). That will be your start of formula, which I already decided long before you come in case I cant feed you myself. I already rang your Paed and she agreed on my decision. If you then shows any lactose intolerence, than I guess I have to bring you to the paed and seeks for solution.
Khilfi, again, mama is so sorry for this possibilities that might be happening. It is going to be something that mama will miss in fact. but khilfi sayang, i will keep on feeding you untill the day I become totally dry. Trust me. I will keep my words sayang.
Ya, Allah, peliharakanlah Khilfi Ezzan dengan sebaik-baikNya.
With love,
your b-feeding obsessed mama
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kaezrin at 5:34 p.m.